If you want to put your views across to a minister or senior government official and you don’t have (a) a lobbying and entertainment budget, (b) a secret “commissions” slush fund, or (c) a relative in the ministry, you need to follow these simple guidelines to get your message across. At ¡Revolución! Communications your mission is our passion.
Commit to a brand identity. Many underestimate branding as a superficial exercise and an unnecessary expense. However, have a browse through a good branding handbook relevant to your business, and you will see that every revolutionary success story is underpinned by a great brand.
Be brief and to the point. Ministers and senior officials are busy people, and most of their correspondence ends up in a pile to be read by some junior flunky. No-one will read a turgid 40-page manifesto with your sophomoric musings on Marx or Bakunin unless you plant a bomb. At ¡Revolución! Communications we believe that non-violent forms of expression can be just as effective. A few well-chosen words, suitably framed, are all you need to get your point across. A slight verbal tick (e.g. brackets or random capitals) might help to suggest that you are slightly unhinged, but don’t go overboard.
Pick a distinctive logo. We are big fans of the red star. Some say it is over-used but we think it has an elegant timeless simplicity. It says “I’m a left-of-centre revolutionary” but without too many specifics (for this reason we advise against the hammer and sickle which lost its freshness long ago).
Spend some time picking a signature. You may wish to preserve some mystery around your identity. This may be necessary for security purposes, but it is also a useful way of implying that you are a movement rather than a lone nutter. We recommend this revolutionary name generator as a starting point. NB: It is essential that you check that your chosen name isn’t already in use – you wouldn’t want some young punk taking credit for your righteous actions.
Say it with a gift. Always accompany your letter with discreet gift that helps you to communicate your message. Make sure you comply with your own corporate gift policy and that of the recipient. As a rule, it is good to pick something inexpensive so as not require an entry in the gifts register. In your case, we recommend something punchy – like a bullet (not to be confused with bullet points, remember “powerpoint is evil”). Also: as with words, so with bullets. One is enough to make your point. This is not a Cretan wedding.
Image: Letter received yesterday by the Greek Deputy Finance Minister in charge of taxation, accompanied by a single bullet. The letter reads: “TRYFON ALEXIADIS, COLLECTOR OF THE WERMACHT… UNTIL THE HOUR <0> YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT FEAR MEANS, YOU AND YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS… RED FACTION.” A similar letter, also accompanied by a bullet, was received last week by the Chair of the the advisory committee on pensions, the so-called “Committee of Wise Men”. Taxation and pension reform are two of the key areas where the government is pushing forward with further austerity policies as part of the latest bailout agreement.